Should I Do It? My Wife Wants Me To Get Her Best Friend Pregnant

Dear Tee, I never imagined this was possible. I and my wife have been married for seven years with two amazing kids. Our sexual life has been polyamorous which is unconventional but incredible.  Because we usually have threesomes with her college best friend Sarah but it happened by accident.

It started as a drunken threesome in Cancun during spring break and evolved into an amazing dynamic between the three of us. Her best friend has been like a second mom to our kids since day one. She’s there for every birthday, and every milestone, and even helps with nighttime routines when she stays over.

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The kids adore their “Aunt ” but have no inkling of our polyamorous dynamic after all they are kids. She’s independent, successful, and has never wanted to settle down but lately, she’s been talking about wanting a baby. But something happened a few days ago after we put the kids to bed.

The three of us had a nightcap which is amazing by the way and were relaxing with a couple of drinks afterwards. Suddenly my wife said something that’s been keeping me up. “What if my husband was your donor?” she said to her best friend. “You’ve seen what amazing kids he makes,” she added with a wink.

I nearly choked on my drink. But as the conversation developed, it was clear this wasn’t just a passing thought. They’d been discussing it for weeks. I don’t think they’d understand what it will do to our polyamorous situation or if they did, they didn’t care.

My wife’s best friend has been researching sperm banks but feels uncomfortable with the idea of an anonymous donor.  My wife thinks it’s perfect that her friend gets a baby from someone she knows and trusts, and our children would have a half-sibling they already love.

I don’t have an issue with the fact that they don’t want to do it through a clinic but I am afraid that doing it “naturally” will ruin our existing dynamic. My wife says she doesn’t mind and she is even excited talking about it. She can’t hide the excitement at the idea of me getting her best friend pregnant, just like she was when we were trying for our kids.

But I am concerned for our kids. As they grow older, they might realise the polyamorous situation and would they be repulsed? I like the idea but deep down I know I should probably say no. This could complicate everything. But watching them plan and discuss it, seeing how much they both want this… I’m seriously considering it.

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The thought of having another child, this time with my wife’s best friend is starting to feel right in a way I never expected. The most surreal part? My wife is already talking about how our kids would love having a little brother or sister at their “ aunts  house.” She’s planning playdates and family vacations like it’s the most natural thing in the world.

Am I crazy for even considering this? The legal implications alone should terrify me, but somehow they don’t. I think I’m going to say yes. God help me, but I think I’m going to do it.