I am Pregnant With A baby I’m Not Taking Home

Four weeks ago I passed out at home and was taken to the hospital. And to my greatest shock I am pregnant. Then it was about 27 weeks and I had no clue before then because I still get my period and my stomach was the tiniest it has ever been. No bump and no symptoms.

I have been sexually active and I have always used protection and also was on the pill. But on the night I had my last sex, I had an awful hangover the night after the one-night stand and I had no idea that when you puke after taking birth control it is ineffective. By the way, I am a single parent.

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And I’m not ready for a third child because my two children are both disabled (age 1&2) so I’m in and out of the hospital often. So finding out that I am pregnant is pretty disturbing. My first child attends a special school and the second is on a CPAP machine and multiple meds daily.

He also has been on life support 3 times this year. Which i was lucky enough to find a family who would look after my other child some days, and other days he would visit with me. I live my life on stress. I’m already at breaking point. It was because of this stress that I sought to destress and it ended up like this.

Still, I can’t decide what to do without telling the father. So I called and asked when he would have time to talk. I told him that I was pregnant and he said he doesn’t want to know. But after a while, we met and had a long conversation and have both agreed that adoption would be the right choice. I’ve spoken with an adoption agency who is visiting me this week.

However,  I met up with my friend for lunch and told her about the baby and the fact that I simply can’t handle another child. This my friend has fertility issues and has been trying to get pregnant for years on her own (via sperm donors ). And she expressed interest in adopting my baby and we can go to an agency to get it legalised. On her part, she will support me through pregnancy & birth.

And that she would keep it an open adoption I’m in huge shock And my mind is all over the place. After I told my parents that I was pregnant and my friend’s request. They are telling me it’s a bad idea and I should adopt out to someone I don’t know instead of my friend. Their reason is that it will be less painful in the long run and for me to move on especially if the baby is healthy.

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The baby’s dad says my friend is a great idea as long as his rights are stripped fully and I am starting to think that it’s the best decision.  My baby going somewhere I know she will have a beautiful and amazing life comforts me. I know that my life will be awful and I know many people will never find themselves in my position so I know advice will be short and some people won’t understand my position.

I’m just here to vent because being pregnant in my situation is a lot. Are my parents right?  Am I making the wrong decision in possibly doing this?