Dear Tee, I never thought l’d be posting here but man I need to get this off my chest. Been with my girlfriend for 3 years and was saving for a ring and everything. Then her phone starts blowing up at 2AM like every night. She’s all “it’s just work stuff” but like… at 2AM? Come on. I know everyone says don’t go through your partner’s phone but whatever I did it anyway and my life just exploded right there.
It wasn’t just one dude. FOUR. DIFFERENT. GUYS. All these separate convos with pics I never wanna see again, them planning hookups, and worst part? They were all joking about me. One was literally my best friend since we were kids, another was her boss (classic), our freaking neighbor from down the hall, and that “gay friend” she was always hanging out with who surprise surprise, wasn’t actually gay.
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This had been going on for like 8 months while l’m working double shifts to save for our future and stuff. When I finally confronted my girlfriend, I thought she’d at least try to deny it or cry or something. Nope. She straight up laughed and was like “took you long enough to figure it out.” Said I was “too predictable” and she was “bored.” My so-called best friend texted later saying “it wasn’t personal” and “these things happen.”
Like wtf man?? I just grabbed my stuff that night while she went out to “clear her head” which probably meant hooking up with one of them. It’s been like 2 months now. Moved to a different city, blocked all their asses, started therapy cause I was messed up. Then yesterday she calls from some random number crying about how she made a huge mistake.
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Turns out my girlfriend boss boyfriend fired her after getting what he wanted. The neighbor moved away, my ex-friend got busted by his girlfriend, and the “gay friend” ghosted her once he got bored. She had the nerve to ask if we could “work things out.” I just laughed and hung up. Some things you just can’t fix, and finding out your girlfriend’s been living a whole secret life with four other dudes? Yeah that’s definitely one of them.
Right now, I am focusing on myself and healing. I am asking if I handled it well enough considering that there’s a part of me that feels I was too harsh with her. But yeah I am traumatised and its going to take me a while to get over it.